Kiss Body Building Workouts Goodbye!
I walked out of the locker room at the gym yesterday only to hear a gym regular telling one of her cronies that she was going to train biceps and triceps that day.
I couldn’t help but feel sorry for this wannabe.
Every day, she, along with her parakeet-legged hubby and his overflowing love handles, slop their way through some inept combination of a body part workout, marked by isolation movements and their ongoing love affair with the cable machine.
This day was bound to be no different. I mean, don’t you have to actually have a set of triceps before you devote an entire workout to upper arm mass?
I was willing to give her one last shot, though.
Maybe she and that lug of hers were finally going to prove me wrong and open up with some weighted dips or close-grip bench presses to awaken those feeble, malnourished pea shooters.
How about some close-grip chin-ups to really stimulate those biceps that appear to have been on a ten-year slumber from countless sets of cable curls?
Not a chance.
A brutal set of lying triceps extensions, followed by a gut-wrenching set of French presses must have set those babies on fire.
Oh no, they weren’t done yet. They proceeded to pump out some heavy duty concentration curls, and they really hit a grand slam with some dynamite preacher curls.
Sadly, like many around them, this delusional duo actually considers themselves hardcore.
Nice Try, Wet Wolf!
“That looks like a very good arm routine to me. In fact, my current arm workout looks a lot like that!”
First of all, rose petal, you have no business devoting an entire workout solely to arms. You haven’t earned that privilege yet. That’s for seasoned Figure vixens with a very solid foundation of muscle.
Second of all, every exercise listed in that pitiful workout is performed sitting or lying down. Seriously, would you like me to get you a pillow and a blankey so you can take a nap between sets?
It’s no wonder you look like a cross between a Hawaiian Tropic bikini model and a yoga instructor.
“Not so fast, Wet Wolf! I lift weights five days a week!”
What are you doing at the gym all five of those days, may I ask?
I don’t know what you’re doing, but I do know what you aren’t doing – physique transforming compound movements that’ll illicit a profound body composition shift.
And yes, that’s something you’re sorely in need of. In one of my previous articles, I told you that unless you were under 18% body fat you had no business counting macronutrients or calories. All you needed to be focused on was eating clean, whole foods and exercising.
Well, I’ve got some news for you: The same rule applies here.
Unless you can do at least five chin-ups and fifteen push-ups, you have absolutely no business doing cable flies.
If you can’t do twenty below parallel single-leg squats, then you’re banned from the leg press. (Well, you shouldn’t be doing the leg press anyway.)
You see my point, though. Far too many antsy females follow a ridiculous workout from some women’s fitness magazine they snatched off the shelf at the local grocery store as they ran in to grab a plate of Santa cookies with sprinkles and jimmies for the office Christmas party.
Then we have the ladies who think they’re advanced after nearly three months of consistent weight training who do a body part split like your typical clueless gym rat. You’ve seen it (or maybe even done it); the one that goes something like biceps and calves, abs and back, shoulders and triceps.
So, how come body part splits are so wrong for females, anyway?
I’ll tell you why.
Females have a dramatically lower strength ceiling than males.
If a male has several years of weight training under his belt and has attained above average strength levels, then training upper and lower body in the same training session would detract from one another, as opposed to performing training sessions exclusively for each.
Therefore, because of the naturally lower strength ceiling, a female can experience all the positives and none of the drawbacks of a total body training session.
Another reason for females to be pro-total body training is that they’re predisposed to higher body fat levels than males.
When you train your entire body, you create a much greater energy turnover and metabolic disturbance. This leads to a substantial energy deficit, sparking fat loss.
Best of all, this provides females with that coveted elevated heart rate they long for. Brief recovery periods are less taxing on the nervous system when supersetting upper body movements with lower body ones.
However, total body workouts containing supersets are far more taxing on the respiratory system.
Think about it; instead of repping out sets of ten squats with a nickel on each side because you’re only resting thirty seconds between sets, why not really ignite that cardio-pulmonary system by raising the weight on the bar? Add an extra two reps to each set, increase your rest between sets a bit, but do an upper body movement in between each set of squats.
“Hold on, Wet Wolf. I think I heard you say before that it was silly to try to use weight training as the sole purpose of increasing heart rate with brief recovery periods.”
It is, if you do it every time you step on the weight room floor.
That’s the great thing about total body workouts for females; they can be used to build muscle just as easily as they can be used to torch fat.
For the wannabe who needs to build some strength and muscle, or the Figure Athlete who wants to burn off some fat in order to reveal her polished, rock solid, lean physique, the total body workout meets your needs.
Wet Wolf’s Total Body Workout
Let’s take a look at each day of the workout and what it entails.
Monday: Strength
A1) Band-assisted chin-up
Sets: 5
Reps: 5
Rest: 60 seconds
A2) Front squat
Sets: 5
Reps: 5
Rest: 60 seconds
B1) Standing dumbbell shoulder press
Sets: 5
Reps: 5
Rest: 60 seconds
B2) Single-leg dumbbell deadlift
Sets: 5
Reps: 5
Rest: 60 seconds
C) Ab wheel
Sets: 5
Reps: 5
Rest: 60 seconds
Wednesday: Hypertrophy
A1) Low-incline dumbbell bench press
Sets: 3
Reps: 9
Rest: 60 seconds
A2) Sumo deadlift
Sets: 3
Reps: 9
Rest: 60 seconds
B1) Single-arm dumbbell row
Sets: 3
Reps: 9
Rest: 60 seconds
B2) Bulgarian split squat
Sets: 3
Reps: 9
Rest: 60 seconds
C) Crocs
Sets: 3
Reps: 9
Execution: Place a plate wrapped in a shirt or towel under your toes while in a push-up position, internally rotate your humerus, and “paw” yourself across the floor.
Friday: Fat Loss and Endurance
A1) Single-leg squat
Sets: 2
Reps: 20
Rest: 60 seconds
A2) High-incline bodyweight row
Sets: 2
Reps: 20
Rest: 60 seconds
B1) Steep-angle push-up
Sets: 2
Reps: 20
Rest: 60 seconds
Execution: Perform the push-ups on the bar in a Smith machine or squat rack.
B2) Single-leg hip pop-up (with one foot elevated)
Sets: 2
Reps: 20
Rest: 60 seconds
C) Stability ball crunches supersetted with stability ball V-ups
Sets: 2
Reps: 20
Rest: 60 seconds
That’s it.
“But what about my four-times-a-week cardio obsession?!”
Hold on, Skippy! First of all, the Friday workout is going to have you gasping for air worse than when you popped out of the water after your older brother dunked you at the local swimming pool.
If you don’t believe me, just wait and see.
I’ll allow one other day per week for general anaerobic conditioning for the skinny, no-muscle crowd and two additional days per week for the fat loss seekers.
Anaerobic day: jumping jacks for 30 seconds, mountain climbers for 30 seconds, rest for 30 seconds
Perform that five times through and add an extra wave each week. The goal is to eventually survive twelve rounds.
Totally Sexy
I don’t care how hardcore you think you are or how big of a newbie you are, you can, and will, make solid gains if you follow this routine for a good four weeks.
So, now you know a vital component to your success. Take advantage of it and change your physique.
Kiss Body Building Workouts Goodbye! by Jeff Kuh
